Archive for January, 2006
Been there and done that
Living with social anxiety is tough. Along with the usual feeling of anxiety, insecurity, and despair, there is a constant feeling that something is wrong – something that needs to be fixed. For me, this feeling was always present. I felt as though I needed to be cured, but could not find the right method [...]
Origins
Is social anxiety disorder a chemical imbalance? Is it genetic? Is it environmental? Is it a combination of the two? I don’t know, and what’s more, I doubt if the experts know either.
Accepting who I am
One of the biggest challenges I’ve had to face is accepting who I am. I’ve come to realize that there are many attributes I will never have. I’m not really remarkable in any way. I have average looks, intelligence, and no exceptional talents.
I spent so many years hating everything about myself and envying others [...]
Seeking help
Two years ago, I decided that I would make an effort to save myself, and to go and get help. At that time, I was living back at home with my parents and really had nothing going for me at all. I had no job. I had no friends. I had no girlfriend. I felt [...]
Social Anxiety and motivation
I spent most of my life feeling sorry for myself. I knew there was something wrong with me, but I had no idea what it was. I could not enjoy life the way others seemed to. Activities that were meant to be enjoyable were, instead, frightening and awkward. While others looked forward to a game [...]
The fear of failure
I hate making mistakes. It’s probably part of my perfectionist personality to fear failure. In fact, up until about two years ago, I avoided any activities that had a chance of failure. I liked it safe and predictable. I avoided all social interactions that did not have a chance of a favorable outcome. I avoided [...]
Social Skills (or lack of)
I have a hard time relating to people. It’s not that I intentionally want to be seen as quiet and weird, it just turns out that way. It’s not that I hate people, it’s just that I find it difficult to connect with others. Most of the time people make me very uncomfortable and, try [...]
A little success is better than none
One thing I’ve learned is that you can waste a good portion of your life feeling bad about yourself. Feeling that somehow, you don’t measure up and that the rest of the world belongs to some sort of elite club for which you will never have a membership. I spent many years beating myself up [...]