Take a look around
The next step in the stare process (Taking a look at my surroundings) involved interacting directly with the outside world. Observing my surroundings as soon as I stopped my obsessive thinking was critical. At this stage, I needed to raise my head and really take a good look at the situation. I always did this within seconds of stopping my runaway thoughts.
I had to make this reality check as soon as possible, because it dislodged me from my own obsessive, introverted world. It shocked me back into reality.
Personally, I am always thinking the worst in any social situation. My mind will fabricate all kinds of warped beliefs as long as I sit there without looking at my surroundings. As long as I keep my head down, I will never know any different. Basically, I psyche myself out with pure fiction. However, at the time, it seems absolutely real and unquestionable. The mind is a powerful thing. Never underestimate the depth of its creativity.
When I forced my head up and looked around, the horrible “inward thinking” melted away as I anchored myself to the “real world.” Undoubtedly, I would observe something a little less sinister than what my mind had concocted. I found that people were not staring at me at all. They were not watching me walk, talk, chew, drink – they were simply carrying on with their own lives.
I have been so sure that I was being stared at and made fun of, only to look up and see nothing remarkable at all. And this happened many, many times! That’s what I got for trusting my “instincts.”
Truthfully, unless there is something very unusual and unique about you, chances are people won’t even notice you. They have better things to do. Could you imagine someone standing in public judging and criticizing every normal looking person on the street?
“He’s walking funny.”
“Her face is too red.”
“He’s staring at the ground.”
“He’s too quiet.”
“What a bunch of losers.”
Well, I tell you, anyone actually thinking along those lines, would never have a spare moment to do anything else – but more importantly, society just might question his sanity.
Newsflash! I wasn’t that remarkable after all – and, most likely, you’re not either.
So why did I feel as though I were the center of attention all the time?
Hmm…
One Response to “Take a look around”
Oddly, of late I’ve been feeling like a lot more people are staring at me. It makes me uncomfortable and my workaround is to just keep my head down and ignore them. I don’t know why it’s started up lately. It’s not like I got a new haircut or something. Who knows.
Probably all in my head anyway.
Keep up the good work, Drew.
Dave
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