Class is in session

The once quiet classroom was now filled with loud conversation and laughter – quite a contrast to the serene setting only moments ago. Amazed at how loud a few dozen people could be, I was vaguely aware of the fact that I was the only one not taking part in all the idle chit-chat. Surely, I must have stood out like a sore thumb.

However, at that moment, my mind was preoccupied with other thoughts. I kept playing over different scenarios and different outcomes for the task ahead of me. I knew that we were expected to go into groups and prepare presentations for everyone else’s viewing pleasure. The groups were made up of approximately 5 people. Not everyone would have a chance to present since the limit was 3 presentations per group. I learned all this from previous participants.

So, the situation that I hoped and prayed for was one where there would be no introductions at the start of class, and where I would not have to do a presentation to the rest of the group. The thought of all that coming together gave me a glimmer of hope, but I knew it wasn’t realistic. It seemed the company almost took pleasure in making this as difficult as possible for the less extroverted – or at least that’s how it felt.

So at 8:31, the instructor looked at her watch then assumed her place at the head of the class.

“Could I please have everyone’s attention?”

The dull roar ceased instantly, and within 10 seconds you could hear a pin drop. She asked to have the door closed. Somehow the closing of the door really sent a surge of anxiety coursing through my body. It just seemed too intimate when the room was closed off from the rest of the world. Every move would be noticed now. Everyone would be concentrating on the task at hand. Any behavior that was out of the ordinary would be picked up immediately.

The projector screen still read, “Welcome to customer satisfaction training.”

She surveyed the room, smiling, and trying to make eye contact with every participant. She seemed very comfortable not saying a word – just smiling and acknowledging everyone. Obviously, this was second nature to her and, for a second, I almost envied the way she handled herself. There was no hint of fear, and it almost seemed as though she enjoyed it. I suppose, in a way that I could never begin to understand, she did.

I was very mindful not to avoid her glance. They had a way of figuring out the “non-participating” types and pushed them that much harder. This was a lesson I had learned years ago in high school.

In fact, the atmosphere was exactly the same. Yeah, we were a lot older, but that was about it. The same crushing anxiety was having its way with me; just like old times. I really thought that this would be a non-issue as an adult.

The screen flipped to the next slide as she fumbled with the remote. I was sick with fear and literally felt like passing out when I saw what was up there.

The screen read, “Agenda” and the first item under that was, “Introductions.”

So much for hope.

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