Conversation - the “approach” image
I’ve often been told that I have a very serious look. Now, I know there is something to this because I’ve heard it from different (friend and foe) sources throughout my life. Who was to know that there was a lesson to be learned from all the teasing I endured through school? Ironically, had I really listened to what they were saying, and done something about it, I would have ceased to be a target.
One thing I’ve leaned about myself in the past few years is that my facial expression always mirrors my mood. Amazingly, I’d lived 30 some years without realizing this – being unaware of how noticeable it was.
In the past, I would always make an effort to present a friendly, easy-going image while in the company of others. Unfortunately, my brain would go into overdrive as I analyzed every single word and gesture. This resulted in the “serious” look I had. I was so self-conscious, I couldn’t function.
The more I tried to overcome these thoughts, the more aware I became. The “runaway” effect was similar to the severe blushing problem I had – the more I thought about how red my face was, the redder it got.
In order to make any progress in the area of conversation, I had to get this very undesirable trait under control. I needed to change my way of thinking. I had to migrate from internal to external. I had to start focusing on what was happening around me, instead of what was happening inside me.
In my opinion, there is a minimum requirement needed to initiate and carry on a decent conversation - and from my experience, two things are absolutely essential. A smile is one, and eye-contact is the other.
I’m focusing 100% of my effort in trying to improve my “approach” image.
One Response to “Conversation - the “approach” image”
Hey, it takes practice! I ACUTUALLY practice smiling, laughing and talking to myself in the mirror. Seriously. And then to myself not in the mirror. lol. Go that far. I know it seems “fake” at first, but once you master it and people actually start smiling and laughing back, you will begin to do it naturally. There is nothing more fun than having people vibe with you. Fake it till you make it buddy.
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