Ive often been told that I have a very serious look. Now, I know there is something to this because Ive heard it from different (friend and foe) sources throughout my life. Who was to know that there was a lesson to be learned from all the teasing I endured through school? Ironically, had I really listened to what they were saying, and done something about it, I would have ceased to be a target.
One thing Ive leaned about myself in the past few years is that my facial expression always mirrors my mood. Amazingly, Id lived 30 some years without realizing this – being unaware of how noticeable it was.
In the past, I would always make an effort to present a friendly, easy-going image while in the company of others. Unfortunately, my brain would go into overdrive as I analyzed every single word and gesture. This resulted in the serious look I had. I was so self-conscious, I couldnt function.
The more I tried to overcome these thoughts, the more aware I became. The runaway effect was similar to the severe blushing problem I had – the more I thought about how red my face was, the redder it got.
In order to make any progress in the area of conversation, I had to get this very undesirable trait under control. I needed to change my way of thinking. I had to migrate from internal to external. I had to start focusing on what was happening around me, instead of what was happening inside me.
In my opinion, there is a minimum requirement needed to initiate and carry on a decent conversation – and from my experience, two things are absolutely essential. A smile is one, and eye-contact is the other.
Im focusing 100% of my effort in trying to improve my approach image.