It’s funny, with all the time I’ve devoted to improving my social anxiety problem over the past three years, you would think that I’d be able to handle the odd “bump in the road.” You would think that with all the progress I’ve made, it would take a major cataclysmic event to derail me. At least, that’s what I thought.

I don’t know if it’s just bad luck, but trouble seems to find me wherever I go. I always try to mind my own business and I never look for negative encounters, but somehow they always find me. (more…)

Here’s an interesting theory. If you had told me about this five years ago, I would’ve laughed to myself and dismissed it within a second.

I’ve always been very interested in self-help books. You might even say I’m a little addicted to them. One thing I’ve become very interested in lately is the notion that what you think will become your reality. In other words, if you believe you are inferior to others, that will become your reality, and others will begin to see you in exactly this way. (more…)

If you suffer from moderate to severe social anxiety, the very idea of changing your outward appearance can seem overwhelming. Yet, in my case, I knew that, deep down; I was not helping my cause by appearing so unapproachable. (more…)

As a social anxiety suffer, I tend to be hyper-sensitive when it comes to the feedback I get from other people. Granted, the way I interpret their responses might be a little skewed, but thats improving.

Because of this acute awareness, Ive discovered that there is a direct connection between how I feel (and project myself), and the way people respond to me. In other words, if Im feeling good, I usually get a friendlier response from others. (more…)

College was a tough time for me. Though I was sure that Id be leaving all my troubles behind once my high school days were over, I was just kidding myself. Things didnt improve much except for the fact that we were treated as adults now. Other than that, I was utterly alone. The only good thing was that the juvenile, school-yard bully tactics were now a thing of the past. (more…)

If you suffer from social anxiety disorder, chances are, your anxiety is written all over your face. Personally, I always try to hide it, but this becomes impossible in some social situations. Most people dont really know what anxiety looks like, therefore, they are more likely to regard me as an anti-social, pissed-off, mean, cruel, little man – obviously someone to avoid. (more…)

My long-term goal is to overcome social anxiety disorder and start living a normal life.

Well¦Duh!

Ok, an overly simplified, but true, statement. Its just too bad that getting there wasnt as simple.

The fact of the matter is that I may never reach that ideal stage – well, at least not without some kind of personality transplant. Its always good to have high hopes and even higher goals, but does that automatically make one a failure unless those goals are reached?

My all-or-nothing mindset says yes, however, Ive learned that it is possible to achieve success without absolutely owning that ultimate goal. Ive learned to accept small achievements and I can see my life improving in ways that I couldnt have imagined.

So, until I can say that Ive beaten this thing, Ill relish my accomplishments along the way. As they say, getting there is half the fun.

Here are 10 things I do to improve my quality of life while I exist (somewhat) harmoniously with social anxiety disorder: (more…)

Yes, we all love to evaluate people, even if we dont admit it. In fact, most of us are probably unaware that we even do it. What is this need to have someones number; to have them figured out in our heads? Its really like some sort of competition, and were all looking for chinks in the armor. Why? (more…)

Comparing oneself to others is as natural a human trait as eating, breathing, or sleeping. Most often this obsession to compare our strengths and weaknesses against that of other people is an automatic thing. I do it all the time without even thinking about it.

When I meet a person for the first time, I unconsciously have them figured out within seconds. Everything from their physical looks, to their facial expressions, to the way they walk and talk. I immediately classify them according to countless criteria. How I interact with this person will be entirely based upon this evaluation. (more…)

The next big break came months later. I had been diligently following the program I set out for myself – maintaining a minimum number of exposures per day, going that extra step and really pushing myself. I was in a constant state of self-awareness and refused to let the old social anxiety habits take control. I was very aware of my appearance and walked with my head up, smiling at others when warranted (though most times I didnt feel like it). (more…)