"If you are going to buy only one book on social anxiety, this is it. This book that not only compassionately presents various perspectives on social anxiety, but it also offers a vast array of solutions. It turned out to be more of a "self help" book than I expected in more areas than just shyness. The author had experience in social anxiety, so he really hit home with things he expressed. I was able to finally overcome my social anxiety thanks to this book!"
-Drew
I was at a little get-together this weekend with some friends and family. No big deal, just the usual people plus a few I didn’t know. Nothing exciting, we usually have a BBQ, play a little Frisbee, and have a few beer.
Now, I don’t know if it’s me and the fact that I’m beginning to notice different personality types whenever I’m out in public, but it seems that lately there is a lot to watch and take in if you really look for it.
Living with social anxiety is tough, but it could be worse. That’s the realization that I’ve come to at this point in my life. Yes, I sometimes feel cheated and I can’t help but feel a sorry for myself on occasion, but I really think I need to start putting things in perspective. I still have my health (knock on wood), I’m doing okay financially (of course everything is relative), I’m starting to meet more people, I’m making a few friends, and I’m getting out more than I ever have. On top of all that, my anxiety in public places and around strange people is subsiding with each passing month.
If you suffer from social anxiety, you probably don’t think much of outgoing, confident people - I know I don’t. It depresses me to be around extroverts like this. I always end up making comparisons and beating myself up because I can’t be more like them. I mean, they just seem to be having so much fun!
To be honest, I am probably more jealous than anything. Well, that, and the fact that they make me feel so inadequate.
If you suffer from moderate to severe social anxiety, the very idea of changing your outward appearance can seem overwhelming. Yet, in my case, I knew that, deep down; I was not helping my cause by appearing so unapproachable. (more…)
Life is not a one-way street.
Ive printed this sentence out and taped it to the wall beside my computer. I read it several times a day, as it reminds me of one of the most important laws of social interaction and happiness. Up until recently, I didnt really know it even existed. (more…)
If you suffer from social anxiety disorder, chances are, your anxiety is written all over your face. Personally, I always try to hide it, but this becomes impossible in some social situations. Most people dont really know what anxiety looks like, therefore, they are more likely to regard me as an anti-social, pissed-off, mean, cruel, little man - obviously someone to avoid. (more…)
In 2002, (as social anxiety tightened its grip on every aspect of my life) I quit my high paying, corporate job out of desperation. It wasnt a decision that I made lightly - after all, this was my career and my livelihood. I was employed by that company for 4 years. Once the deed was done, I felt completely lost - as though Id just made the biggest mistake of my life. Yet, deep down, I somehow knew that the decision was the right one. (more…)
Society operates according to its own rules when it comes to social interaction. Regardless of how we would like things to function, we, nevertheless, must tailor our approach according to a protocol that has been thousands of years in the making.
And what if we dont conform? Well, Ive personally tried the rebel approach and did my own thing while ignoring the rules. The result was a very lonely, anxious, depressed existence.
(more…)
Social anxiety disorder has been a problem for me since early childhood, but its only recently that Ive discovered it is the result of bad programming and bad habits. I apologize to anyone that thinks Im over-simplifying matters. As always, Im relating my discussion to my own personal experiences.
Ill talk about bad programming first.
(more…)
Social anxiety disorder had won the first round, but I was back to try again. This seemingly insignificant achievement made me proud. In previous years, I would have found a way to get out of there and avoid any further punishment. I would have gone into a full-blown depression for a week or so, running the events through my head hundreds of times - beating myself up for being so weak and pathetic.
However, today was not that day. I felt a surge of confidence simply because I was now able to recover from a negative encounter. I felt a little more mature and capable. Its hard to describe in words, really. (more…)
