How to Conquer Social Anxiety

It’s funny, with all the time I’ve devoted to improving my social anxiety problem over the past three years, you would think that I’d be able to handle the odd “bump in the road.” You would think that with all the progress I’ve made, it would take a major cataclysmic event to derail me. At least, that’s what I thought.

I don’t know if it’s just bad luck, but trouble seems to find me wherever I go. I always try to mind my own business and I never look for negative encounters, but somehow they always find me. (more…)

This weekend my parents are entertaining some of my out-of-town relatives. For years it’s been kind of an unofficial tradition on the Labor Day weekend. We don’t always congregate at my parent’s house; we alternate each year between three or four different households. Fortunately, this year I didn’t have to travel too far.

Yesterday, in lieu of a traditional backyard barbecue, we decided to visit a local restaurant for dinner - all 21 of us! The whole thing was pretty uneventful except for the fact that we drew a lot of attention to ourselves when we arrived. I suppose this place hadn’t seen that many customers walking through the front door in sometime. Although I felt everyone was staring at us (about 10 other tables), it didn’t really affect me much - at least, not as much as it would have years ago.

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A few nights ago I was sitting at home watching the Olympics when I noticed that every single athlete selected for an interview seemed very comfortable in front of the camera. Of course, some seemed more at ease than others, but for the most part, everyone was able to handle speaking in front of a billion people okay.

I often wonder if there are any very successful, or famous, people that struggle with social anxiety disorder - because it seems that anyone that is in the public eye has the ability to speak relatively calmly to an audience. I know a lot of this comes with practice over the years, but even those that have become famous in a short period of time seem to handle themselves quite well.

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Living with social anxiety is tough, but it could be worse. That’s the realization that I’ve come to at this point in my life. Yes, I sometimes feel cheated and I can’t help but feel a sorry for myself on occasion, but I really think I need to start putting things in perspective. I still have my health (knock on wood), I’m doing okay financially (of course everything is relative), I’m starting to meet more people, I’m making a few friends, and I’m getting out more than I ever have. On top of all that, my anxiety in public places and around strange people is subsiding with each passing month.

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With each passing day, I find my spirits lifting. While I still have a long way to go with my social anxiety problem, I am finding it easier to relate to others and stand my ground when things are less than ideal. In a way, its almost been like the classic snowball effect, where things dont gain momentum until you hit that sweet spot - then watch out. (more…)

Over the past few years, I have built a list of exposure tasks that I engage in. I generally perform these according to the emotional state Im in at the time. However, I always manage to do something each day. For me, thats critical, because if I let things slide, then Ill feel like doing less the next day.

The list varies from easy to incredibly difficult. Keep in mind that the degree of perceived difficulty may differ from person to person. (more…)

While browsing through You-Tube looking for social anxiety type videos (many of the personal video blogs are quite interesting), I came across a clip of, what appears to be a guy with SA, being put on the spot by David Letterman.

Now, one could automatically assume that this individual had social anxiety disorder because of how nervous he looked, the fact that he didnt smile, and how he turned down Daves offer to play some audience participation game. However, after thinking about it for a bit, Im not so sure that we can assume he had SA. (more…)

The topics I write about are generally based on social anxiety. However, I also enjoy writing about other self-improvement techniques I feel have helped me deal with many difficulties - including SA.

The previous post is a good example of that. It is merely a coping technique that can be applied to many difficult situations - and I have used this with great success. (more…)

Social anxiety disorder has contributed towards a lifetime of pain and suffering. There is the obvious anxiety, fear, low self-esteem and depression that I have had to deal with all my life, but it has also taken a toll in a slightly less obvious way.

Up until now, this condition was left to run unchecked. It delayed, and in some cases, prevented many normal events from taking place in my life. I feel that I have either missed out completely, or started way too late in most cases. In fact, Its as though Im just getting started. Whoever coined the phrase, better late than never certainly was the eternal optimist - I, on the other hand, tend to be a little more realistic. (more…)

Peeling back the layers and starting from the lowest common denominator is something that I have been hammering away at for many of my previous posts. I apologize for the repetitiveness, but I want to convey the importance of this, and also be as detailed as I possibly can. (more…)