Something was missing. I had just spent the better part of a week contemplating my situation and still couldn’t put my finger on the reason for my failure. One thing was certain – It would take more than exposures (no matter how small) to break this cycle. I thought I was on the right track with my incubation approach – and I actually was – its just that I hadn’t prepared myself personally. (more…)

Most of my social encounters turn out to be mediocre at best. Occasionally, I do have my moments and I am able to function in, what might be perceived to be, a completely normal manner. In fact, once in a blue moon, I’m actually able to step out of my usual comfort zone and truly enjoy interacting with others. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does, there’s nothing like it. (more…)

One of the worst things about living in an apartment is having to go out to do my weekly laundry. What I wouldn’t give for a washer and dryer of my own. Of course, I’m not the only one that has to put up with this minor inconvenience. There are thousands of people in this city that make the same trip down to the local laundromat each week. (more…)

Here’s an interesting theory. If you had told me about this five years ago, I would’ve laughed to myself and dismissed it within a second.

I’ve always been very interested in self-help books. You might even say I’m a little addicted to them. One thing I’ve become very interested in lately is the notion that what you think will become your reality. In other words, if you believe you are inferior to others, that will become your reality, and others will begin to see you in exactly this way. (more…)

If you suffer from social anxiety, you probably don’t think much of outgoing, confident people – I know I don’t. It depresses me to be around extroverts like this. I always end up making comparisons and beating myself up because I can’t be more like them. I mean, they just seem to be having so much fun!

To be honest, I am probably more jealous than anything. Well, that, and the fact that they make me feel so inadequate. (more…)

As a social anxiety suffer, I tend to be hyper-sensitive when it comes to the feedback I get from other people. Granted, the way I interpret their responses might be a little skewed, but thats improving.

Because of this acute awareness, Ive discovered that there is a direct connection between how I feel (and project myself), and the way people respond to me. In other words, if Im feeling good, I usually get a friendlier response from others. (more…)

If you suffer from social anxiety disorder, chances are, your anxiety is written all over your face. Personally, I always try to hide it, but this becomes impossible in some social situations. Most people dont really know what anxiety looks like, therefore, they are more likely to regard me as an anti-social, pissed-off, mean, cruel, little man – obviously someone to avoid. (more…)

Heres something you can try on your own. The first time I did this, I was amazed at the difference it made.

Pick a day when you are feeling good. This is important because, if you have things on your mind, or you have just endured some negative experience, this wont work. Fortunately, everyone eventually has a day where they feel just a little better than normal. Im convinced that this has a lot to do with our body and brain chemistry. (more…)

Society operates according to its own rules when it comes to social interaction. Regardless of how we would like things to function, we, nevertheless, must tailor our approach according to a protocol that has been thousands of years in the making.

And what if we dont conform? Well, Ive personally tried the rebel approach and did my own thing while ignoring the rules. The result was a very lonely, anxious, depressed existence.
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A big part of being a good conversationalist is the ability to listen. Being tuned in to what other people are saying is essential for good two-way communication. People know when they have your undivided attention¦or not. (more…)