I eventually came to the conclusion that, although there were many people concerned about my well-being, it was ultimately my responsibility to take control of my life. No one was going to do this for me. I couldnt just sit back and have my ideal life unfold in front of me – but wouldnt it be great if it happened? Imagine a successful, social phobia free existence without lifting a finger! (more…)

The cycle theory helped me get through the lowest point in my life. Yeah, I know its simplistic, but for me it actually made a huge difference. I couldnt believe I hadnt used it since having so much success a few years back in an intolerable work environment.

My belief that the next upturn was right around the corner, had to be strong. I tried not to think about the present situation, but about possibilities that might lie ahead. I concentrated on very routine tasks and pastimes while I waited.
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The cyclical theory of life was pretty much spot on. If you stopped and really observed what was going on around you, you would know that it was real. I decided to give it a try and kept this thought with me as I struggled through my workday.
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Sitting on an outdoor patio, sipping beer on that warm July night, I was introduced to a theory that would help me deal with pretty much anything that life could throw at me. Although it was not a cure for social anxiety, it did help me through some very difficult times. Its just a shame that I used it once and forgot about it until I hit rock bottom years later. (more…)

I am ashamed to admit that a few years ago I thought about packing it in – I mean permanently. I felt trapped and it seemed that there was never going to be anything in my life other than pain and suffering.

It didnt matter what others said to try and cheer me up – I was in such a state that their advice just went in one ear, and out the other. I was in such a deep, dark place that I felt I was beyond any sort of help at all. It scares me to bring up the past like this – knowing how close I was to losing everything. (more…)

The divide-by-two rule is not something new in the area of self-improvement – so the concept may be recognized under different names. This technique is something that Ive worked on and customized to help with my own situation. The name is just something that came to me at the time. (more…)

As I mentioned in the previous post, lack of motivation is not confined to one personality type. Im sure that most of us (shy or outgoing) have had to deal with motivational challenges at some point in our lives. The reason I decided to tackle this first, was that it would prevent me from implementing any plans that I made to overcome SA. (more…)

Lack of motivation, procrastination, and maybe a little downright laziness, were certainly not qualities that I could be proud of. The first order of business in my quest to turn my life around was to take stock. I put everything down on paper – both positive and negative – the negative far outweighing the positive. (more…)

Money became tight and I came to the realization that I couldnt afford to keep seeing my psychologist – I started to feel a little sorry for myself. Here was the help I had been looking for, but circumstances wouldnt allow it to continue. There was that unseen force again – working hard to ensure my failure – at least thats how it felt at the time. (more…)

Social anxiety wasnt a 24/7 problem – that would have been way too much to handle. It would turn on and off depending upon the situation. For example: it was pretty much non-existent when I was at home and around my parents or brothers. (more…)